Baby Got Back?

"I am open to the guidance of synchronicity, and do not let expectations hinder my path."

 - H.H. The Dalai Lama

We all have values and expectations that define who we are as human beings and, right or wrong, I have always had strong feelings with regards to knowing that those closest to me “have my back.”

Clearly I am doing something wrong.  Possibly, I expect too much.

Maybe I should reflect on what that means to me. What does it feel like when someone has my back? More importantly, why is that feeling so important to me?  Is there a different meaning for relationships?  Friendships?  Co-workers?

I don’t think so.  I’m pretty clear on that.

Either someone has your back, or they don’t. Unless, of course, sometimes they do…and sometimes they don’t.  There must be some discretionary rules that I don’t know about.

Should I be focusing on the expectation instead?  Maybe.  Expectation is a precursor to disappointment.

And since we're all in this together, I guess we should replace expectation with more acceptance of what is...and forgiveness for what isn't.  Which is not to say that we don't have choices.  It is just as important to choose what you will and won't allow in your life as it is to accept and forgive what you shouldn't have. 

In the process of becoming a Reiki Master, I have certainly uncovered layers of myself that I needed to look at, accept and forgive.  I have kicked up the dirt, felt it with my own hands and struggled to allow that loving, universal energy soothe my soul.  However, it's important to know that once you begin uncovering the layers that a process has begun.  And like chemo for cancer, sometimes you have to get really sick in order to get better.  You might say this is when the shit hits the fan.